Goodbye Google


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First, I said goodbye to my beloved IPA's, Second hello to Celsius my drink of choice, third only eating when hungry. Fourth, goodbye to 15 pounds. I know you can't tell because I hide my girth well and have the benefit of height. I like to walk fast too. 

Over the weekend, I said goodbye to another vice, her name is "Google". It was hard to break up with her, because she kept pulling me back. Finally, I bravely excised her from my life. With a final push of the button, my desktop changed quickly. That's when all hell broke loose. She is vengeful and she is spiteful. When she left, she took Dr. Dave, The Pulse of Radio, two info sheets that I subscribe to. 

She walked out with Facebook, Twitter, YouTube, Workday, Amazon and anyone else she had eve had contact with, in my computer. She took them all away like a jilted, vengful lover. Hell, she even wiped out I Heart Web mail. Now that's war, how can I communicate with my corporate minders? The only thing left on my screen was a golf folder, a to do list and commentaries I had written. I guess she missed those, she did, however, leave the trash basket and something called Microsoft "Edge" . Now that was 11:30 Friday night. I knew my Saturday mission was going to involve repairing the damage I had done. Who showed me ADD/REMOVE anyway?

When I rose from my fog Saturday morning, the only thing she left me with was "Edge". Well at least I am not shut out. Hell, she even took G Mail, not that I use it much.  Edge was my sole connection to the Cyber world, likely due to the fact that it came with the machine. 

Saturday at 10a, right after sausage and eggs, I was beginning to regret my hasty break up with Google. I had planned on listening to football and puttering, which is what I do best on Saturdays. "Google, yes she can be a nagging bitch", always wanting to be my search engine of choice. She calls it "default" and of course it's never her fault. Oh yes, it's her corporate overlords who brings on the boorish behaviour. She never quits asking and so you finally give in, "yes you can be my default". 

If she really cared for me, she would stop giving me error 403 every time I ask a question? Now I am reminded why I finally hit Add/Remove, Delete. She started it. By the way, she showed no remorse. Each time I searched and I got error 403 "no other information is available." Who talks like that? I knew there had to be a better way to live, which let me to my decision to excise the bitch.

Not that I didn't have second thoughts. I still had "Edge", but I had been with Google for so long I didn't even know the basics on how to act around "Edge". For example, it's a whole new world just setting up a shortcut. Tools, more tools, Create a shortcut does not work. Truth be told, I tried to take Google back, but now "Edge" was pissed and didn't want me to leave her.  

This war has to end before Monday, or the show is going to be wing it and fling it. I went to the station, figuring there had to be a brainiac like Joe Danyi hanging around to rescue me. Oh know, he's on a weekend family adventure in his camper. Who told Joe to buy a camper and spend time with his family. Dave Price had his own crap storm going with Ohio State and Youngstown State Football , which had to get on the air. Otherwise, we would not have known Ohio State crushed Indiana for the 29th time in the last 30 years and we couldnt wait to find out the Penguins could not stop Missouri State in three successive third and longs, but that another gripe.

i Alright, It's on me, I started cozying up to "Edge" . First, I figured out the shortcuts and I now have YouTube back on my desktop with a shortcut. Life is getting better. Now what about I Heart Webmail, we can't live without that one. Ah the 24-hour help desk, they answered and with a few clicks Web mail is back. My hasty decision to break up with that egotistical Google is looking better. By 1:30 I am almost whole, and I am not missing Miss Google, or is she nonbinary,...... probably. 

Well, It's been 36 hours since the breakup, and Edge has not asked to take over my tool bar or to be my search Engine of the choice, I know it's early but it's a start. She has said nothing about wanting me to choose Edge as my default. This is pretty good, I have a whole group of new friends, theirs Yahoo, Duck Duck go, Firefox, and even one called "Tusk". 

Remember, I am not the one that asked for this? I didn't seek error 403, it visited me like a bad nightmare. No direction, no help, nothing. It just left me to search endlessly with no result. Google started it. She just became too much of a nag. If you're going to insist on exclusivity, you better be good, because there's more than one search engine in the cyber world and right now I 'm going steady with Miss Edge. 

Dan Rivers

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